Monday, October 7, 2013

Tika & Writing Your Own Obituary

Tika appeared to be listening intently as I explained what I'd learned at our society's recent Fall Workshop.

"Paula from Heritage Funeral Home gave a great presentation explaining why we should all write our own story, our own obituary," I told Tika. She blinked.

Paula explained how she sits with families every day and helps them struggle with questions that should have been decided long before that day. "It's such a stressful time for the family, and I'm so sorry for them to have the added burden of writing an obituary now when I know they could have done it long before on a less-stressful day," Paula said. "It's especially hard on the children, especially grown children, who never wanted to "interfere" in their parent's lives."

Paula quipped, "Talking about sex dos not make you pregnant; talking about funerals does not make you dead.  Crafting your own story, your own obituary, is a healthy and kind-for-your-family thing to do."

"Why not write what you  want others to read about you and not what your daughter-in-law has written about you?" asked Paula. "The best person to write your story is yourself. And write your story now while you're in full possession of yourself..... say whatever you want."

I chatted afterwards with Paula and she assured me that most every funeral home will help with writing that obituary whether in a pre-need situation (which is best) or at the time of the death. Most funeral homes offer a packet of information pages outlining just what is needed in a "good" obituary, "so don't be shy about asking," Paula said.

"So, Little Tika," I asked her, "shall we now write your obituary?"  Tika was born on the 18th of September 2009 somewhere in Idaho.........................

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